How to Drink Away Your Broken Heart

So it’s been a few weeks now and you haven’t heard from your ex girlfriend and you’ve been acting like a borderline stalker trying to figure out her Facebook password or going over the conversations you both had.

Hey dude, don’t feel too bad. There are thousands of men going through your same emotions at this very moment! You need someone to talk to 24/7… someone trustworthy and non-judgmental.

Well, I have a few friends that’ll help you through this turbulent moment in your life.

Their names? Jack Daniels, Jim Beam, Bud Weiser and there are a lot more over at your local Korean liquor store.

Where is Joe Crow (Jose Cuervo Tequila) you ask? You don’t want to invite that guy to your pity party. A few shots with that guy and you’ll be doing some stupid things. Believe me… as a relationship coach; I’ve seen it over and over again.

If you’re not man enough to hit the whiskey, you can drown your sorrows away with some beer. Here are THE RULES for drinking beer though:

1. Stay away from the malt liquor – especially if you plan to drink it from a brown bag.

2. Do not drink more than 2 beers. Most of you won’t be able to stick with this rule, but I’m warning you. Anything more, and you’ll just start acting like a weak idiot – 2 beers maximum with some salty sides.

Now for the good stuff:

Whiskey – I don’t care what kind of Whiskey you purchase, just make sure you drink it neat or with a couple of ice cubes. None of this Jack and Coke stuff, ok??

1. Just find a quiet place and sip it slowly. Take your sweet time and let your memories flow.

Marijuana – Who ever said that this stuff is dangerous, is a joke. It’s only a harmless plant. Take a puff or two – you deserve it.

1. Try to get your medical marijuana card or find that local who sells the good stuff. Find a friend take a few hits and have a laugh.

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